Fear the Bears? Or Fear the Beard?

Kyle Orton is currently listed third on the Kansas City Chief's QB depth chart. This will afford drunken Bears fans the opportunity of throwing old number eighteen replica jerseys at him as soon as the first Hanie incompletion hits the Kentucky bluegrass of Soldier Field. Hanie's uneven quarterback performance has many Chicago faithful looking wistfully back at a time where the man behind center was more consistently a winner and more consistently sporting a beard on his neck.



Did Kansas City deal the Bears a crushing blow by claiming Captain Neckbeard? Well, the short answer is we will see this coming Sunday as the teams face off one another. Orton is third on the depth chart for now but the Chiefs, like any other NFL team, have not always been married to their depth chart they release earlier in the week (I think Thomas Jones has been listed as the Kansas City Chiefs' number one back since the AFL/NFL merger in the sixties). If Orton starts and waxes the Bears in Chicago (he does have a 15-2 career record there at after all) it will be hard to stifle the urge to STARE WITH BURNING JEALOUSY at the Chiefs front office.

Scott Pioli will receive one withering Helen Thomas glare for every touchdown Orton throws.

Bears fans do have to keep perspective however. Hanie has been getting a lot of criticism for his performance this past Sunday. It's almost as if fans in Chicago were not expecting a backup quarterback to be playing against the Raiders. Yes, those three interceptions were killers. But every new starting quarterback in the NFL is going to make mistakes, particularly when playing in a hostile environment. And I mean hostile: people get stabbed in the Raiders' parking lot. Straight up stabbed. That's fucked up.

So Hanie is playing with the idea of shiv-wielding Oakland DE's dancing about in his head and he gets a little nervy and make some bad throws. It's going to happen. The Chicago Bears should expect this. And Hanie in the second half tightened up considerably, going 11/18 and 1 TD. If he improves that fast in just one game, I am not too worried about his performance at home against a weaker opponent (The Kansas City Chiefs, it should be noted, does not have two of the American Gladiators for their kicking staff). If the defense does it's job, consider this one a victory for the Bears and part of the emergence of Caleb Hanie as a serviceable backup quarterback in the National Football League.

Caleb "Three and Three" Hanie in action

I'm looking forward to the match-up. There is a part of me obviously that would like to see Orton having the reps against the Bears. It would be an interesting storyline and I have always liked watching Kyle Orton, whether he was playing for the Bears or the Broncos. However, I think that part of me is called the "I don't want the Bears to win the game" part. Just so Hanie gets all the help he can get, let us as Bears fans hope that Tyler Palko impresses in practice.